Perception
by Aelimir
Summary: Everything happened like it did in 2009, except the Narada never attacked Vulcan. After several missions, Pike retires and Jim is appointed in his place. The downside? He's required to have Spock, that bastard who tried to get him kicked out of Starfleet, as his First Officer. Jim soon learns that perception is everything, and not all is as it seems.


The newly minted Captain Kirk couldn't believe his luck. He'd just learned yesterday that he'd been assigned the Enterprise. Now he was sitting with McCoy, reviewing the crew manifest, approving and rejecting applicants that were within his power to do so.

"Hey, look, isn't he the Russian kid that somehow smuggled vodka into class?" Jim mused, pulled up the file of Chekov, Pavel. "We should definitely have him on board."

"How did you become Captain again?" grumbled McCoy.

"Pure genius and some generous help from Captain Pike," Jim reminded him. "After retiring, he didn't want the Enterprise going to just _anybody_."

McCoy grunted. "So who's on the command team? Other than you and I."

"Well, there's Uhura, applying for head of communications –" he hit accept after viewing just her picture, which earned an eyeroll from McCoy – "Scotty – who the heck is Scotty?" Jim scrolled through his file quickly. "Whoa, _he's_ the one that perfected some of the latest transporter upgrades." He approved his request too. "Look, Cupcake wants to be head of security. NO way. Oh, there's an Andorian applying too." He read his file, mildly interested to know he was a descendent of Commander Shran and had experience on the Royal Guard before his entry into Starfleet. "Got him! That's all of them. Except you, of course, but you're a given."

McCoy looked confused. "You've got a couple pretty large gaps there. What about – "

"Oh, yeah. That." Jim looked less enthused. "Pike said he would only give me the Enterprise on one condition: that I keep Spock on as Science officer and First Officer for the entirety of the mission."

"Spock? Who's he?"

"Remember that hearing I had awhile back?"

McCoy frowned, thinking. "Oh yeah! You mean he is that Vulcan that charged you with academic dishonesty?"

"The very same one," Jim said unenthusiastically. He'd gotten the charges dismissed, but the incident still rankled him. He'd never talked to Spock again, and was glad when he had gone off with Pike. Even if he'd wished for the First Officer position himself.

"Damn," McCoy grumbled. He was silent for a minute as he watched Jim pick out the lower ranking officers. Then he spoke again. "If he has all this experience as First Officer, why isn't he Captain instead?"

"No idea," Jim said, thinking that the snub was unlikely to endear him to Spock any more than their shared past had. "I met him briefly yesterday. He was just as much of a stuck up bastard as ever. I have _no_ idea how I'm supposed to survive five years with this guy."

"Well, Jim, I have hypos and know where to stick 'em," McCoy said in support.

"Maybe I'll set up his Science station in Sickbay," Jim mused. "No wait, even better, by Shran's. Andorians hate Vulcans." Yeah, maybe if he was lucky, Shran would keep most of Spock's attention and make things more bearable.

"I have enough computers in Sickbay, I don't need another one," McCoy agreed.

Jim finished his work with a final, decisive tap on the screen. "Well, we've got one whether we like it or not."

Just when Jim thought his situation with Spock couldn't get any worse, it did.

He stared at the quarters next to his, clearly labeled "Commander Spock." He was going to have to live next to that bastard. He was going to have to share a _bathroom_ with him. Pike was an awful, awful, man, even if he did give him the Enterprise. Maybe he got vindictive pleasure in inflicting Spock on someone else.

"I am here, Captain," said an unpleasantly familiar voice behind him.

Jim spun around, face to face with Spock, surprised.

"As you were in front of my door, I drew the conclusion that you wished to request my presence," Spock elaborated.

"Uh, no, Spock, that won't be necessary," Jim said quickly.

"Very well. I shall retire to my quarters." Spock stepped past Jim, shutting the door behind him without a word.

Jim let out a breath, and continued to move his stuff in. Spock's stuff was already on board, so he probably didn't have much to do at the moment. If Spock were anyone else, he'd invite him to his quarters to chat and start building command rapport while he unpacked. Hell no, there was no way he was going to do that.

When he had just finished his last box, the door buzzed. Jim answered it, only to find Spock on the other side. He did his best not to let his face fall.

"May I come in?" Spock intoned, when Jim made no move to invite him.

"Of course," Jim said reluctantly.

They stood awkwardly just in front of the doorway, once it closed behind Spock. "I assume you are done unpacking?"

"Yeah, just finished my last box," Jim confirmed.

"I wish to discuss bathroom usage. What are your preferences?"

_To never, ever see you_, Jim thought. "How about we set up a schedule. That way we don't mess each other up."

"That is acceptable," Spock said.

As Spock agreed to an arrangement where he and Jim were sure not to interrupt each other, Jim let out a breath of relief. Ok, maybe at least sharing the bathroom wouldn't be so bad. This also had to be the most civil conversation they'd ever had. Still, he shooed Spock out the door as soon as he could, saying he needed to meet Scotty.

Which he did, anyway. He headed to the conference room he had set up for that purpose. He'd barely said hello to the man when he found himself at the receiving end of a rather passionate tirade.

"Now, sir, with all due respect, as honored as I am to be chosen as your chief engineer, I simply cannae work without Keenser! He's the best assistant around, all the other ones are just idiots and don't understand how I operate! I must insist that you reconsider his application or we'll have to renegotiate this position!"

Jim gaped at him, searching his brain for what the crazy Scotsman could possibly be talking about. Keenser… Keenser… "Isn't that the scaly hobbit alien who can't even speak Standard?" Oops. Maybe not the best way to speak to him about the guy he was obviously good friends with.

Scotty, however, didn't seem deterred. "Aye, that'd be the one," he confirmed, without missing a beat.

Jim shrugged internally. He supposed it couldn't do any harm to have him on board. Plus, he was a little impressed by Scotty's loyalty. If only Spock were like that about him. But no, he seemed more like the stab-you-in-the-back type. "All right, Scotty. I'll accept him on a trial basis and see how he works out."

"Thank you, sir," said Scotty, much more amicable now. "He won't disappoint you, sir."

Scotty turned out to be a pretty cool guy, and by the end of their conversation, Jim felt really good about his choice of chief engineer. Why couldn't he have Scotty as his First Officer? What was Pike _thinking_?

He met Shran next, who was friendly enough, even if he refused to call him anything but Pinkskin and seemed a tad overenthusiastic about his job. Still, he was better than Cupcake. Now that he'd met everyone, he called a meeting of all the senior officers to discuss their first mission, before the Enterprise left spacedock.

Jim smiled as McCoy claimed the seat next to him, but stiffened as Spock sat on the other side. No one else seemed keen to claim the spot next to Spock, either. Uhura walked in last, visibly tensing when she saw where the remaining seat was. She sat down without looking at Spock, and focused completely on Jim, waiting for him to start the meeting.

Jim discussed the trade agreement they were to set up with a pre-warp society, and the disguises McCoy would have to help come up with, since some of it would have to involve surgery. He selected Uhura for the mission, of course, and volunteered to go himself, since he was in charge of diplomacy. He selected a few security officers as well.

"Captain, as Science officer, I believe it is my duty to serve on the away team as well," Spock finally pointed out, when Jim made no sign of including him.

"Noted," Jim granted. "However, it's generally against policy to have both the Captain and the First Officer on the away mission." He barely glanced as Spock, tense. He felt like he was back in the courtroom, facing Spock's accusations.

"That is mainly when the aliens are believed to be hostile. We have already established their peaceful nature. I estimate the risk to be negligible. In addition, my skills are necessary for the successful completion of the mission."

Jim could feel everyone staring at him, wondering what he would do. Damn, but he didn't want Spock there. Still, Spock had him cornered. He couldn't afford to risk the failure of his first mission over his dislike of Spock, intense though it was. "Very well. Any other issues we need to discuss?" Jim asked in a defeated voice.

No one did, so he dismissed everyone, and the Enterprise was on her way. Jim escaped to his room and collapsed on the bed as soon as he could get away from Spock. Ok, so other than Spock's insistence on accompanying him on the away mission, he hadn't been _too_ bad. Still, Jim felt like he was just waiting for the other shoe to drop. He was probably just waiting for Jim to fuck up, so he could steal his captainship from him. Well, though shit, there was no way that Jim would let that happen.

They all beamed down the next day. Spock went ahead, scanning the environment with the security officers, while Jim and Uhura hung back. Spock had said it was a standard safety precaution, so Jim didn't argue, seeing that it bought him less time with the Vulcan bastard.

"So, Uhura," Jim ventured after a bit of awkward silence. "I think you know the beef I have with Spock. What's yours?"

At first she looked like she didn't want to answer, but then she relented. "We were together, for awhile."

"Really? That bastard?"

"I know. He can be sweet, in his own way. But I'm pretty sure he's gay."

"_What_? I didn't see that one coming," said Jim.

"I know. I don't think he even knew himself, though recently, he seems to have realized it."

"Still a bastard," Jim responded.

"I won't disagree with you there," Uhura laughed.

Spock and his team declared it safe, so Jim and Uhura rejoined them. Spock, unfortunately, took his place by Jim's side, much closer than Jim would have liked.

Jim did his best to ignore it as they met up with the aliens, and at first, all seemed to go well. Then, things turned unexpectedly hostile. It turned out the Klingons had gotten there first. Jim and the team scrambled for cover, and soon they were cornered, with the security team firing shots at the aliens while Uhura called the Enterprise for help.

Jim and Spock had gotten separated from the others, and were now crouched back to back, firing incessantly. "We cannot keep up this barrage. I estimate 5.394 minutes until our power cells drain and we are captured or killed. Uhura may not be able to get through to the Enterprise before then," Spock shouted at Jim.

"Then I'll give myself up, and they'll let you go," Jim said. They'd made it clear they wanted him, and just him, though _why_, he wasn't sure.

"Unacceptable," said Spock. "We must find another option."

"Look, pointy, I'm the Captain here," said Jim, irritated. _Unacceptable_, huh? He bet Spock thought he had his picture in the dictionary under that heading. With a burst of frustrated temper, he started to stand, only to be halted by a powerful hand gripping his shoulder. Jim whipped his head around, glaring at Spock.

Abruptly, Jim found himself shoved to the ground, with Spock covering him with his body, firing rapidly. But, something wasn't right with Spock's breathing. Jim spat dirt out of his mouth, attempting to wriggle out from underneath him to see what was going on, but Spock was too strong.

Fortunately, he didn't have to come up with another plan, because they were then beamed up to the Enterprise.

The first thing he heard was McCoy's cursing. Spock got off him, finally, and Jim scrambled to his feet, about to yell at him for defying orders. But he was stopped mid-breath as he took in the green blood seeping through Spock's shirt. McCoy herded Spock to a stretcher, and the Vulcan obeyed without complaint. Despite his dislike of the man, he _had_ just saved Jim's life, or from serious injury at the very least, so he followed the stretcher, concerned.

"Is he going to be ok?" he asked McCoy, when he finally finished his work on Spock a half hour later.

"Yeah, don't worry, the bastard will be back on his feet in no time," the doctor grumbled.

"I think he saved me from getting shot," Jim mused, as though he didn't quite know what to make of it.

"Well, there must have been _some_ reason Pike liked him," McCoy speculated.

"As soon as he's better, we'll have a briefing. Keep me posted," said Jim, before leaving Sickbay. He really wasn't sure what to think of Spock now. He might be a stuck up bastard, but he sure was brave. He had protected Jim despite everything that boiled between them. He could respect that. Even if he was still a bastard.

Spock recovered in record time, so it was only a few days until Jim finally sat down with him for the briefing. Spock strode in, a little pale, but otherwise appearing in good health. Jim decided it best to get the first part over with. "Well, Spock, I believe I owe you some thanks. I've put a commendation in your file," Jim told him, reluctant, though genuine.

Spock took the seat across from him. "I was merely discharging my duty as First Officer," he informed him.

Right. Okay. Way to kill any warm feelings that might have started. "Of course you were," Jim said, through gritted teeth, wondering why that statement had smarted. It wasn't as if he wanted Spock to like him, wasn't it? It was quite the hopeless case, anyway. He didn't think Spock liked _anybody._ "On the other hand, I don't appreciate you defying my orders. Whether you find them 'unacceptable' or not, you must obey them. Need I remind you of this?"

"The exception is when the First Officer believes the Captain is recklessly endangering his own life or those of others," Spock responded evenly, not appearing the least bit contrite.

"So is that the excuse you're going to be using every time, Spock?" Jim asked, incensed.

"It is not an excuse, Captain. I sincerely believed you were recklessly endangering your life, and I found that unacceptable," Spock stated evenly.

"Right," said Jim, not believing him. That would mean Spock actually gave a damn. "Moving on…"

They composed the mission report together, and Jim reluctantly admired Spock's ability to instantly summarize everything in a clear, professional manner. If he weren't so concerned about Spock stabbing him in the back, he'd already be trying to think of ways to get Spock to compose those reports from now on. Jim hated them. As it was, he had to supervise Spock to make sure he didn't say anything that might jeopardize Jim's position on the Enterprise.

When the briefing was finally over, Jim hurried out, breathing a huge sigh of relief. Next time, he'd bring Scotty or something. The briefing would be way more fun, then. Maybe he'd even bring something from his still that Jim turned a blind eye to.

For the next couple missions, Jim got his wish. Scotty wasn't too happy about being parted from his engines, but when Jim gave Keenser permanent assignment on the Enterprise, he accepted the landing party duties with good grace. He still didn't quite trust Spock not to take over the ship in his absence, but at least now he was having a lot more fun.

After he finished his latest hilarious briefing with Scotty, he found himself accosted by Spock in the hallway. He stood in front of Jim, stiff as a board, seemingly at a loss for words. If Jim didn't know better, he'd say the Vulcan was nervous. Well, tough shit. He wasn't going to make it easier for him. Jim just raised his eyebrows and made to go past, but Spock finally spoke up, forcing him to stop.

"Will you join me in my quarters for a game of chess?" Spock asked.

Jim stared at him in surprise. _What_? "Chess?"

"Yes. As an intelligent individual, I drew the logical conclusion that it would be a game you would excel at."

_What_? "Are you feeling all right?" Jim asked. Because Spock definitely didn't think he was intelligent. So, clearly something was very wrong.

"I am functioning within normal parameters," Spock informed him seriously.

"Right. Normal parameters," Jim repeated dubiously.

"Now that we have established my state of health, do you accept?" Spock asked.

Jim really didn't want to spend time with Spock, though he was intrigued as to why he would extend such an offer and even call him intelligent. What was he planning? "Just a quick game. I still have my mission report to finish," Jim said. Without Spock there to help him, it was a lot more difficult, though he would rather eat his own toenails than admit that to the know-it-all Vulcan.

So, minutes later, Jim sat with Spock in his quarters for the first time, playing chess. He decided to just let Spock win, to get it over with more quickly. Spock frowned slightly, and the puzzled expression grew more the deeper they got into the game. At the end, when he checkmated Jim, he met his eyes. "You made no attempts to win, despite the openings I gave you."

"Guess I was just distracted by thoughts of the mission," Jim said with a careless shrug. Now that this weirdness was over, he could get back to work.

"If you would like to play another game, please inform me," Spock told him.

"Sure," Jim said, doubting he would take him up on the offer. Still, it hadn't been too bad; Spock hadn't made any negative insinuations about him this time. Maybe if he was bored, he'd do it again.

A few weeks went by. Spock repeatedly requested more games, but Jim turned him down every time. Then McCoy accosted him unexpectedly one day.

"Look, Jim, he was a real bastard when you two first met, no doubt about it. But, don't you think it's time to bury the hatchet?"

"How did he get _you_ into his fan club?" Jim asked irritably. McCoy was the _last_ person he thought Spock would be able to win over.

"He's a goddam walking computer who thinks way too much of his damn logic, yes, but that's beside the point. I think he genuinely wants to make amends with you. He just sucks at it."

"What makes you say that?" Jim asked.

"He's come to me a few times about you. Wants to know how to approach you," McCoy admitted. "Now, I'm not saying to go all sunshine and daisies on him. But maybe you could try spending more time with him. Get to know him when you're not arguing over regulations. Who knows, you might find a decent guy buried under there. Deep, deep down." McCoy did not look entirely convinced himself, but he looked far more confident than Jim felt.

"All right. I'll accept his next invitation," Jim agreed. At the very least, he could get Spock to stop bugging McCoy about him.

So, a few days later, he sat across from Spock in his quarters, playing chess with him again. This time, he made an effort to win, though he still didn't quite gun for victory like he normally would with anyone else. "So, Spock. What's on your mind?" Jim asked.

"Specify," Spock requested.

Ok, that was too vague for the precise Vulcan. "You've been wanting me to spend more time with you. Any particular reason?"

"You are tenser around me than the other crewmen," Spock said. "I wish to improve our relationship."

Ok. "Fair enough," Jim shrugged.

"May I inquire as to the source of your discomfort?" Spock asked.

Jim met his eyes incredulously. This guy really had no clue? No way did he want to tell him. "Don't worry about it," Jim said finally.

Spock's brows pulled together, but he didn't push further. "Very well."

Spock won, but by a narrower margin than last time. "Another game?" he asked.

Jim dithered. It really hadn't been that bad, and he had nothing else to do. "Sure. Why not," he said carelessly, before the silence got awkward.

Jim stared blankly at Spock's long fingers as he set up the board. He felt Spock glance sharply at him, and he jerked to meet his gaze. "What?"

Spock studied him, then said, "It is of no consequence."

God, Spock was weird. "Okay."

"So, Spock. What did you think of our last mission?" Jim asked, when Spock did not offer any more conversation. Spock had started going on missions with him again, citing regulations left and right.

"It was challenging, yet ultimately, yielded a positive result," Spock said.

"Yeah, it was nice to get that mess with the Klingons sorted out on that planet," Jim agreed.

"I was referring to the fact that your shirt stayed intact the entire time."

Jim gaped at him. "Was that a joke?"

"Vulcans do not joke." But his eyes were glimmering.

Jim burst out laughing, despite himself. "Oh my god, Spock. That is awful."

"Yet, you are laughing," Spock pointed out.

"Just because it's you," Jim said before he could stop himself. Where had that come from? He quit laughing, then made his next move.

Over the next few weeks, Jim accepted Spock's chess invitations with more frequency. Then, one night, Pike called him privately on the comm. "How's it going on the Enterprise?"

"It's going," said Jim. "I've got a great crew."

"How about you and Spock?"

Jim tensed, uncertain. "He's okay. Very competent."

"You don't sound enthused."

"I don't understand why you insisted on his assignment, sir," Jim burst out before he could think better of it. He'd had this conversation with Pike when he'd first got the news, of course, but he hadn't gotten anything out of Pike beyond, "because I say so."

"What if I said it was because he insisted on yours?"

"_What?"_ Jim said, his jaw dropping.

"It was the funniest thing, Jim. Right before the end of the mission, I called him into my office. Offered him the Enterprise. You know what he said?"

"What?"

"No. No, Jim, turned me down flat! I asked him why. He said he would prefer if you got the appointment."

"_Me?_ Why?"

"Wouldn't say much beyond that you had an "outstanding record." Which, I'm sorry Jim, but that was bullshit. Something else was going on."

Jim had to agree. "Then what happened?"

"I said I would appoint you only if he stayed on as First Officer for the mission. He agreed."

"How come you didn't tell me this before?" Jim asked.

"You wouldn't have believed it. Now that you know him better, you do. Don't you?"

Jim hated to admit it, but yeah. He could actually kinda see it now. "He's not what I expected."

"I know you had a rough start, Jim, but he's obviously gotten over it. He's a great First. I didn't assign him to you to torture you." Pike smiled knowingly.

Jim laughed. "I thought you had. I guess not." His thoughts and feelings about Spock were now in a confused whirl. How would he act around him now?

"I'll let you go," said Pike. "Got some things to do."

"Goodnight. Kirk out." Jim stared at the now empty screen. He still couldn't believe what Spock had done. Now he felt kinda bad for how he treated him, though it hadn't seemed to have bothered Spock much. After staring blankly at the wall for another minute, he got up. He needed to process this, and he knew just who to talk to.

As soon as McCoy saw Jim entering Sickbay, the doctor pointed at him. "Don't tell me – it's about the hobgoblin."

"Don't call him that," Jim reproached gently.

McCoy stared at him incredulously. "I've heard you call him worse!"

"I've changed my mind."

"What happened?"

Jim repeated what Pike said. "I don't know about him anymore. What to think about him."

"Sounds like you should be talking to him, not me," McCoy said.

"Why would he _do_ something like that? I mean. He charges me with academic dishonesty, goes off with Pike, never talks to me again, and all of a sudden wants me to captain the Enterprise instead of him? I mean, where's the logic in that? I didn't even _do_ anything. I thought he viewed me as some kind of juvenile delinquent."

"Well, if you ask me, his mind is a damn scary place. I wouldn't want to visit it," McCoy advised.

"What am I supposed to say to him now?"

"Just ask him, Jim," McCoy insisted. "Stop cluttering my Sickbay!"

"I love you too, Bones," Jim said with a smirk as he was shooed away.

Jim approached Spock's door. Now _he_ was the nervous one. Spock opened it, and now that Jim was looking for it, he could see that Spock was pleased to see him. Funny what new things could be discovered with a different perspective. "Hey, Spock."

"Captain," said Spock politely. He stepped back to let Jim in.

"Actually," Jim said hesitantly, as the door closed behind him. His instinct was that, whatever the reason for Spock's request, it was personal, not professional. Things would need to change between them. "You can call me Jim. Please."

Oh, Jim could definitely see that Spock was pleased with _that_. His entire countenance softened and his posture relaxed. How had he missed this? "Very well, Jim," Spock agreed. "Can I help you with anything?"

"I, uh, was wondering if you'd like to play chess. We could go to my quarters, if you want," Jim invited. He'd never asked Spock to spend time with him before.

Spock didn't quite smile, but something about his eyes suggested he was, regardless. "Of course."

They settled down at Jim's table, with the chess board set up between them. Jim fidgeted with his pieces, trying to figure out his next move, both with the game, and with Spock. Finally he decided to just blurt it out. "I had an interesting conversation with Pike a little while ago," Jim started casually.

"I did not know you and he kept personal correspondence," Spock said.

"Yeah. Sometimes we do. Anyway. He said that he offered you the Captaincy, but you turned it down. Why?"

"I have no desire to be a Captain. I much prefer my current post, so that I may work on my science projects."

Jim couldn't quite relate, but he could see that. "All right. So why did you ask that I, of all people, be appointed instead?"

"When I reviewed the list of interested candidates, you seemed like the most promising – "

"Bullshit. I might be brilliant, but there are other people who are just about as brilliant, and _don't_ have a juvie record a mile long. One that, we both know, you attempted to embellish." That was the first time he'd mentioned the incident to Spock since they'd started on the mission. It felt good to finally get that out. "Not that I'm not grateful, or anything. But why?"

There was a brief pause. "It is a personal matter."

When Spock did not elaborate, Jim spoke up again. "So that's it?"

"I do not wish to comment further at this time."

Jim stared at Spock's inscrutable face. He didn't look tense, exactly. More like, expectant. Jim decided not to disappoint. "You just don't want to admit you've fallen for my extremely handsome face." Oh my _god_. Did he just try to flirt with Spock? He'd be thrown out on his _ass._

Before Jim could start wishing that he could suck the words right back into his mouth, Spock quirked a brow and intoned, deadpan, "That would only be one of many reasons, Jim." His eyes glimmered.

How had Jim missed this? He'd been so caught up in how they'd first met, that he'd been blind to how things were now. Perception was everything, he mused. "I assume by "many reasons" you mean my incredibly thick biceps, my awesome six-pack, my killer ass, my winning, brilliant personality, and my all around sexiness," Jim teased.

"Perhaps," Spock said playfully, before making a move on the board.

Wow. He could _not_ believe he just had that conversation with Spock. Who knew. "Well, that explains it. No one can compare to my attractiveness. I am bi, you know," Jim blurted. _What the fuck? "I'm bi?" Where the hell had that come from?_ But, maybe that was why he'd gotten so mad at Spock. He'd liked him from the beginning, so it hurt more.

"I will keep that under advisement," Spock said. "Your move."

Jim randomly selected a move, the charged atmosphere making it hard to think. What "personal matters" could Spock be referring to? He'd meant the attraction thing as a joke, but what if Spock was serious, and it was indeed part of the picture? There were just too many unanswered questions. Still, should he really push Spock about it?

"The supply ship, Eridani III, is headed to Vulcan, and requesting a security escort, due to increased Klingon activity in the region," Spock said suddenly.

Jim stared at him, uncomprehending, at the abrupt change of subject. "You want me to petition for the Enterprise to do that?" Normally, Jim _hated_ those kinds of missions, since they were boring as hell. But still. Spock had gotten him appointed him to the Enterprise. No matter what the reasons were, he owed the guy.

"I would. There is a matter on Vulcan that I believe we should attend to."

"Going to keep me in suspense, Spock?" Jim questioned.

"I believe that it would be best dealt with in person, Jim."

Apparently Spock was getting a kick out of keeping secrets today. Still, Jim was intrigued. Maybe this would turn out to be the explanation he was looking for. "All right. I'll do it. But it better be good. You know how much I hate babysitting duty," Jim reminded him.

"I believe you will be satisfied with the result," Spock promised.

Starfleet granted his request. The Enterprise and Eridani III arrived at Vulcan without incident. Spock insisted that Jim beam down with him, alone. "There is someone I wish for you to meet," said Spock.

_Is he going to have me meet his parents?_ Jim wondered hysterically. He'd never done that with any of his significant others before, and Spock wasn't really a significant other, though they still had this strange tension between them that suggested otherwise. Looking back, it'd been there ever since he'd met up with Spock again after getting his appointment to the Enterprise, buried under Jim's anger. "Lead on," Jim said.

They stopped at a dwelling at the edge of town. Spock knocked on the door. A minute later, an elderly Vulcan appeared at the door. "Spock," he said, then his eyes drifted to Jim. "James T. Kirk," he said, and damn, if his face broke out into a smile for a moment.

"Jim, this is Spock," said Spock, gesturing to the elderly Vulcan.

"Nice to meet you," said Jim, following the Spocks inside. So, the old man had the same name as his First Officer. He knew thousands of people named "Jim." What was the deal?

They sat down on some fairly uncomfortable chairs in what was most likely the Vulcan equivalent of the living room. Finally his Spock spoke. "Jim, there is something we wish to tell you, but you may find it difficult to believe."

"Shoot," said Jim. His Spock looked slightly confused, but the old man clearly wanted to laugh.

"I am Spock," said the old man.

"Yeah," said Jim.

"You misunderstand. I do not merely share his name. I _am_ Spock; at least, an alternate, future version of him."

"Bullshit," said Jim. It was official; Vulcans were _crazy_. McCoy was right.

"I can prove it to you," said the old man. "Have McCoy examine us."

Jim supposed it couldn't hurt. "Kirk to McCoy, please beam down with your medical equipment."

"Dammit Jim, you've barely been down there five minutes and you've managed to hurt yourself already? Has to be a record."

"No. And why do you assume it was me, anyway? It could have easily been Spock!" Jim protested.

"I know you, kid! All right, be all mysterious. I'll be down in a minute. McCoy out."

Jim flipped his communicator closed. True to his word, the doctor was there in no time. Jim decided not to tell him what the old man had told him. He wanted to see what McCoy found without that knowledge. "I want you to examine and compare the two of them," Jim said.

"Yes, sir," McCoy said with some sarcasm. Jim knew he didn't like being asked to examine people without any kind of explanation. The sarcasm left his face, though, and his frown deepened. "Think there's something wrong with my equipment," he grumbled. "Damn things. Knew I couldn't trust that creepy Keenser fellow…"

"Your instruments are correct, doctor," the old man assured him. "What are they telling you?"

"That you're an older version of Spock," said McCoy. "But you can't be a clone, because you're older than both of Spock's parents put together."

"Indeed not. I come from an alternate reality, far into the future."

"Well, that would explain these readings, but it's still damn crazy," McCoy grumbled.

Jim stared at the old man. Once more, now that his perceptions had changed, he saw things he'd missed before: the old man was, indeed, very much like his Spock. He found himself starting to believe them. "Okay, say you're right. What happened?"

"Do you remember the Romulan ship that killed your father?" the old man asked.

"Yes," Jim said shortly. Of course, he didn't personally remember, but he knew the story.

"That is also from the future. We came through the same black hole. He exited first, into this reality. I do not know what has become of that ship, captained by Nero. According to intelligence reports, he has returned to Romulus and is preparing them for the supernova that will come in the next century."

"When did you come through?" Jim asked.

"Shortly after your Kobyashi Maru hearing ended," the old man supplied. "When Spock went on his first mission with Pike."

Pieces of the puzzle began to fit in Jim's mind, indistinct. "You made contact with him." He glanced at his First Officer, who was watching intently. McCoy had retreated, sensing this discussion was mainly meant for Jim alone.

"Indeed," confirmed the old man. "I was dismayed to learn of his treatment of you. In my reality, you were one of my dearest friends."

"He convinced me to change my perception of you," Spock explained. "He revealed that he'd never served under a man more suited to be captain."

"It was my interference that nearly cost you your chance at captaincy," the old man stated. "I am pleased that it was restored to you."

This explained a _lot,_ though he still felt like he was missing something important. "Well. I'm sure my counterpart thought you were the best First Officer he ever had," Jim said with a smile.

"Indeed, he made that clear," the old man assured him with some irony in his voice.

Jim turned to Spock, meeting his intense gaze. He tried to open his mouth to say that Spock was pretty awesome too, but nothing would come out. Weird.

"Perhaps I should leave you two alone," said the old man, sounding amused. "Take your time. I will be meditating the in back garden."

After the old man had left, Jim finally found his voice again. "So, Spock. Why do I still have the feeling there is more to this?"

"I do not believe that our relationship has progressed to the point for me to reveal it in an appropriate manner," Spock answered, a slight edge to his voice.

"Okay," said Jim, wondering what "progression" Spock could be referring to. Things were good between them now, weren't they? He said as much to Spock.

"Perhaps we should return to the Enterprise," Spock said evasively, standing.

Jim rose with him. "Hey. Wait," he insisted. "It's okay. I know I've been an ass. But that's over now. You can tell me."

"Evidence suggests you will not take it well," Spock explained.

Now Jim was more intrigued than ever. Spock was a brave man; what could have him so spooked? "Shoot." Jim crossed his arms, gearing himself up. Maybe Spock wanted to say he still had his doubts about him? Well, that was okay, Jim sometimes had his doubts too.

"Vulcans are telepathic," Spock started slowly, obviously reluctant. "When choosing our partners, compatible minds are valued above all other considerations."

"That makes sense," Jim said, uncomprehending.

"When there is extremely high compatibility, the partners are said to be t'hy'la. It is the aspiration of all Vulcans to find their t'hy'la."

"Sure," said Jim. "Why would I take that badly?" Sure, he was sorta tempted to tease him now about Vulcans having such a romantic concept, but pissed? No way.

"The elder Spock has informed me that you are my t'hy'la, and upon further examination, I have found that to be true."

Jim just gaped. Did Spock just tell him he was his true love or something?

"I understand that you find such a relationship undesirable at this juncture, and it is not the nature of humans to even discuss this without extensive courtship."

"G_od_, Spock," Jim blurted out finally. "All this time, I thought you hated me and wanted to take the Enterprise away, and here you believed I was your tile-la whatever?" Their shared past whipped through his mind, his new perception highlighting everything he'd dismissed, what had been there all along.

"Essentially correct," Spock confirmed, a touch of amusement in his voice.

Jim ran his hand through his hair. "What now? What do you want from me?" He felt overwhelmed.

"Merely the chance to show you the potential of our relationship, should you desire it," Spock answered.

Jim laughed nervously. "I've never been good relationship material. I think my longest one lasted a week," he explained.

"Relationships have not been my forte either. Perhaps we can discover the way together," Spock suggested.

"McCoy's going to be _shocked_," Jim said gleefully. He could just see the look on his friend's face. He couldn't wait to break it to him.

"You are agreeing to a period of determining compatibility?" Spock questioned.

"It's called being a boyfriend, Spock," Jim said. "And yeah. I guess I am." He still wasn't quite sure what that t'hy'la business was about, but he thought he knew something about what Spock was referring to. He'd been drawn to Spock from the beginning; like he'd realized before, it was why his initial rejection had hurt so much and caused so much anger. If he hadn't felt that connection to Spock, he wouldn't have cared.

"I am pleased to hear it." Spock paused as his eyes softened, and Jim gave him a small smile. "I have not seen my mother in some time. Will you be amendable to accompanying me on a visit?"

"Sure," Jim agreed, uneasy, but still game. Damn. Looked like he _was_ visiting the parents after all. No doubt he'd make many more unexpected discoveries about Spock there.

Perception was everything.


End file.
